Weddings & Babies… Is Everyone Drinking the Kool-Aid?


Is this where the world is going?

Is this where the world is going?

Why is everyone getting married and/or having babies right now? I’m convinced that there’s something in the water that’s causing people to fall in love with the idea of this idealized union and bearing children. Personally, I have never been one that aspired to be a housewife/mom/domestic diva. Rather, I have always planned my life around education, opportunities and ways to further and better myself, as an individual. I’m totally all for meeting your soulmate and having intimate relationships, but it seems that everyone is jumping into this idealized world of marriage to feel more “grown up.” It’s as if somehow getting married and having children is the defining moment of adulthood; if people don’t give you the proper respect at 22 as the adult that you are, then having children (hell… out of wedlock even!) should solidify your place in the world as an officially official adult.

Dumb, I say.

I don’t think having kids in a family setting is dumb, but I do think that having kids to fill something in your own life is dumb. Beyond dumb even. They do realize that the baby that they bear becomes a living, breathing human being that needs attention and love to grown into a full-functioning, productive adult, right?

Do these people realize that a child is forever? Once you birth a baby, you are forever tied to that person. Not just the baby, but the baby’s daddy (or mama). Is that really a situation that you’re ready for? On top of that, you can’t really enjoy your 20s (or teenage years, in extreme cases). Your life becomes intertwined with the child’s (as it should) and you become wholly focused on their well-being and growth. If you don’t become enthralled with that then you probably should have thought twice about getting pregnant to join the cool crowd. At 23 I can’t even fathom having a child and being responsible for another human being, yet I see 18 and 19 year olds pushing strollers around, proud that they have a kid. You’re proud that you got knocked up by your 19-year-old boyfriend who probably won’t be around in 3 years? I mean… really? Am I the only one who thinks that this craze is ridiculous? Having a baby does not make you cool; it makes you a parent. It doesn’t take a special person to make a child — almost anyone can do it. I understand that it takes someone special to be a parent (something I find wholly different than making a baby) and I do know a few awesome young mothers who consciously made the decision with their husbands to start a family. For that, I give you props. I, for one, could not be selfless enough at my age to give up my education and my career options.

My favorite situation, of course, are the super young moms that won’t have an abortion for “religious reasons.” Here’s my question: You can’t have an abortion, but you can have sex with a stranger without protection? How does one pick when and where their religion comes into play? If it’s a moral issue, I understand that, but to use religion as a lame cop out makes me hysterically irate.

This issue has always been one that I could debate for hours on end, but I felt the need to write about it today as I have run into more (and more!) incapable people having children and young, idealists getting married. For the most part, I think that people don’t give marriage the consideration that it deserves. I fully understand that the divorce rate is super high now (55+%) and that it doesn’t face the stigma that it once did, but does that make it okay to go into a marriage with the idea that there’s a back door; a way out via divorce?

Seriously, people. If you have a brain, use it.

That’s my Friday rant! I realize this has nothing to do with travel, but luckily I get to write about what I want. I’m hoping that I’m not the only one that feels this way about this topic!
 
Much love,

Signature Stamp - Shannon

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